Between soul and Spirit/In the light of Truth






Between soul and spirit


She bit her nails till bleeding, you did not know why yet.


She kept a distance, did not want children it sometimes seemed.


You did not know why.


You taught that you could help her with her child wounds.


She loved and sometimes pushed away.


Wanting to finish the relationship.


What should you do ?


Isn’t the past of generation stories always pushing true ?


Stories of joie and terrible ones she had shared.


You kept on believing that improvement would come through you.


You have wanted children.


Everyone who comes to play his role, will come.


After three years apart and a dozen living together.


A man as enemy image, due to the past was there again.


You were man and guilty in a way.


Can one carry on trying to help ?


When therapy with the guilty ones back in time lacked ?


Then came new listening ears, a new shoulder for her.


You noticed that there was something you did not know.


Material things also counted, hopefully not.


One cannot stay with somebody that understands your life in detail.


One cannot stay with someone who’s inner calm you can’t support no more.


One cannot stay in that calm when the partner doesn’t want to be nice any more.


Opportunities to overcome the negative part of instinct follow…


Revenge is waiting around the corner…you want someone else as well.


You were new in this game, it takes you with it, on the run.


Somebody else, with no heavy burden on the shoulders,…


Is surely waiting out there somewhere.


Forget it, because you are here to learn about every possible problem.


And your solution…making theory of experience in practice.


While knowing that staying nice and tender and helping is the real solution.


Staying in good mood and helping each other and others.


Always hoping for true love and encountering ancestral and present problems.


You notice some need some to maintain their relation or something in between.


But you do not get it yet, because you are in love.


After the cycle of understanding, letting go, comes the essence of the pain…entering by means of something that happens to others or words spoken.


You had to write about it and play roles in the lives of others.


Constantly adapting to different stages of situations.


Until one becomes like an old three which skin wants to burst.


But this is something for the future you hope.




Nature can comfort you, two pigeons come to drink water.


Let go tiredness and al this above and other terrible things in the world.


You carried too much on your shoulders, like so many in different ways.


Wars never stopped from the days you were a child.


Carry less and take your distance.


Rest a while in the sun, it’s spring again.


Travel in your fantasy to a place near mountain and see.




The light that never becomes dark, that only can be somewhere.


There’s no light in the brain but a lot of light being transported.


Because you keep on loving life.


Because of stars and planets, forget men for a while.


Matter contains space as well.


Create some space in your own.




You’ll have to keep on going on, no matter what.


Only through ones again descending in pain ?


By seeing pain as tragic and comic ?


When you have a good day it will reflect in to the others.


We are all healers true words, connections, tenderness, joy…


But confrontation as well.


Through a good inner relation as well.


We travel with people who want to do good things over again...


But they do not understand with who they can and can’t.


Spiritual bands are not to be broken.


You can’t even try, even dough you think so.




Be glad to be in good health and love your senses.


Your life, do not express it in suffering, but in wisdom and feeling good.


Try to understand your own happiness and don’t blame others to much.


Forgive each other, some have difficulties in coping with life.


But again, do not carry to much weight of others on your shoulders.


Wanting someone back again isn’t always a way forward.




Thirty years after having written a letter for his father’s birthday, Ob finds a letter Ob wrote to him at the time, congratulating him on his 59th birthday. 


“It is not easy to contemplate, that is think and write about one’s father.  It is obvious that one has respect and admiration in away, but not easy to put this in too words and make some critical remarks as well.


I always knew you as an enormously hard working man and as someone with a feeling for justice beyond compare…as rare as your blood group. But above …you are someone in very close connection with nature. But what do I mean with all those words pa ? Hardworking. I am grateful that I have had a happy childhood and that I have had a happy childhood. I have never regretted that I had to work very very hard when I was young, I had a lot of useful extraordinary experiences in the field of cultivating and trading fruits. I have lived to see the complete evolution from a little farm, from horse to tractor to truck and so on…first on the local markets and then abroad in the East. I grew up in an environment with a lot of space and working after school hours, I did it to get a lot of weight from your shoulders, that of your wife, your brothers and others. It’s great to have space, land with fruits, storehouse’s, a whole village… . It has helped to build my character and perseverance. I like to take initiative and make my hands dirty and don’t stop till the work has been done.  When I think about all those times we loaded truck with fruit from the region, delivered at our place or on the markets and the times we drove together with all that fruit to Germany in a number of cities having to load it back of… this was quite an experience.  Watching you trying to keep awake all night and in the morning sleep for a couple of hours and drive back home to give your orders at a few the workmen of the village who helped with the trade and a couple of miners who didn’t want to work under the ground any more, but spend their days between the fruit yards.  I watched you when you drove. The expression you had on your face, pure enthusiasm, is unforgettable to me. It was the look of one who is a 100% pleased with what he was doing and believed entirely in it…it had a purpose as all lives have, yours had as well. Your motivation went along with an ability to hold on that I did not meet a lot so far. It’s amazing that you still look like an ugly old man yet. “


    “Only two aspects of the way you are, aren’t in your and our benefit. In stress conditions, you sometimes wind yourself up to much and you want to do everything by yourself then, then blaming us or the workers when things do not go the way you think they ought to. But that doesn’t bother us anymore, because we have become used to it.  Secondly, you are too good with people sometimes, you want to make a compromise most of the time, even if it isn’t in your benefit. It will get you bankrupt if you don’t watch out. Even on the non-business field, in a human way, you give in to quick sometimes…instead of letting others clean up their own mess. You do have a lot of knowledge of the human character but often you judge sharp,, but to quick maybe ? Or am I not old enough to understand ? Let’s just say you are on the watch for others a lot of the time…maybe that’s because of the unnecessary benefits you give them…and not knowing you are sometimes fooled ?  A lot of people were killed in the war you lived and had to hide from and your father as a member of the resistance saved many lives and the local resistance was not to blame for the terrible revenge the village went through for it’ s actions…do you feel as if you must make up for the whole village ? Nevertheless you are a good teacher in combining the worries of the past with the reality of today and the future’s joys of tomorrow maybe. “


    “I did not continue your business. Rationally I hadn’t got the money for it an subjectively I am not a trader…and one part of you isn’t also. For too long I felt as if I did you wrong by this. One thing I know for sure…everything has a reason and the art of producing fruit will go on…if not in then outside the family. I loved the years I was a fruit worker in your and your brother’s company…I loved working on the land more than that trade and that too complicated for me accountancy around it. I have my own family to take care of.


Sometimes I wonder that a thing that you wanted to pass me in life, ‘being religious’, I haven’t got it in me because I behave more as a philosopher and an artist and political militant.  You really think so ? I have taught a lot about those things and I tend to look for a neutral bridge between all kind of sciences and religion. The fact that you not often see me in church, does not mean I haven’t got ‘it’ in me.  I behave more as a Christian in believing and acting in and for a more just world, then by going to church and I will try to hold my family together and raise my children…but these are quite other times then when you grew up and started a family. I try to life my life consciously and with a good conscience. From all off the children and husbands and wives and grandchildren, ‘happy birthday’.”




Once Ob’s father had retired, he began to read ancient texts about religion and others…two of them I found recently back again, ‘In the light of the truth’, must be something like the gnosis texts or not,  he would have a look.








‘In the Light of Truth’,


So there stood  : ‘in the Light of Truth’.  Looked to me like the writer was trying to say that there was indeed a more powerful consciousness than ours that did not have to go all the way our evolution had to pass by from waves to atom and cells. Under that level would be a kind of distributing in between server or ‘light’ distributer…I ‘ll give it my own metaphors to help understand. The text was not referring to any religion in particular or race.


When making an effort to do what is good one gains credits, so much was clear. The author used also the argument that we  often meet again in different lives.  He sees no border between the here and hereafter…this I can understand (see my text ‘there was life after dead as well’), but I have my doubts about that classical reincarnation.  One would wish it was true, seeing the burdens to overcome in some families…but there have to be certain laws that guide parapsychological energy. And I think those rules function according to  the energy present in ancestral telepathy (gone, but not dead) en present energy also under one of his forms : present telepathy.    He goes on explaining that what you think and feel is very important, because it makes links and attracts other people’s thinking and feeling, so in order to not get involved in thinking and feelings of people who think negative of life.  Again this logic starts from a presumption and that is that the same positive energy attracts the same positive energy and good intentions.  But is more complex than that. There are a number of stories before us that wait for completion and the two kinds of telepathies who are one in this world, make happen that what is logically and obvious to follow out of older events. According to the principle of thesis, antithesis and synthesis often, things happen, children are born, the second never the same as the first.  Our free will consist in understanding our own situation in the world around us and choose for our typical own way which corresponds with our real soul…not so much a copy of our ancestors but our surplus.  Does that surplus feels well with this or that person ? Of course if I am wrong then we are all perfectly living together and at an early stage in our being young we chose the wright partner.  To make this basic picture complete, I could add that at a certain time only ones condition an choice is possible. Not everybody needs the same and everybody should evolve from within if one is a bit on a negative road.


What must I remember of all this ? That I shall encounter the things I feel, speak and think one day in the rest of my lifetime(s) ?  If you have a Jack Russel and you educate him to be a hunter, it can be that he starts searching immediately when you come home because of that or mainly because he is a Jack Russel…I think both arguments are true.  If every taught stays in connection with you… there is an gigantic net surrounding people.  The author says that time does not exist, so we have time enough, it is all about the evolution of our inner communication in response to our connections with the rest what is…and that rest is one with you. All you have to do is wanting to overcome negative things, so is written.  But what if in fact the positive and the negative interact because both can get wiser ?  And we all know we have are stronger and weaker parts…so in interaction it is almost impossible to not think now and again something negative about somebody dear mister Abd Bernardt, with all respect.  Wanting the wrong thing represses and wanting good things, lift up, I know my friend. People worry too much and have depressions, not only because of the economic system.



And what about those gnostic scriptures ? They seem to have more of an insight, inner approach to religion…by learning from one’s own experiences, and confronting them with those of others, from a bit hesitating to in the most open way possible one gets to understand the ways of the soul, the mental world…and one becomes more open to a meditative approach of present and ancestral telepathy.  Some of the old gnostic texts show prove of this as some of the current ones as well.   More people than you might think are ‘agnostic’…learning by what they feel in their inner and not taking some dogma’s of churches for the one and only truth.

In 367 after JC the church of Alexandrië under the guidance of Athanasius (Athan-nasty-nes) forbid the gnostic texts and the followers of the gnostic groups hid the texts who later reappeared.  Maybe some people in opposition to the gnostic were afraid of discovering the inner, which might lead to some aggressive reaction towards others.  An intuitive knowledge of ‘God’, like the gnostic called the divine hierarchic energy includes wisdom about people and life and oneself, also about knowledge of all kind itself. Whether starting from life or starting from texts, one can always work with both to approach a good interpretation of the world and life.  Gnostic see everything more in terms of being not  aware about things, rather than only talking about sin and forgiving. Their tradition goes partly back to the ancient traditions of the east, but trying to make the bridge to the rest of the world would only take a start longtime after the documents were found in the second half of the 21th century.  A number of people are not open to a gnostic way of living, others can only understand through metaphors.  How does one explain that one can reach a place of peace inside oneself ?  ‘The light which hasn’t got a shad’, surely they mean the waves, radiation, aura… ?  ‘He knows all spaces, even before they existed’(before the big bang ?). “Earthly bodies often part for earthly purposes and live apart for earthly reasons…but the spirit lives safely in the hands of love and after dead it brings the connected souls back to God.” Esthetically written…and it makes me think that a lot of people are boycotted in their love on earth, by ancestral telepathy and presence of people who are not so close to them as one thinks…but they need them for a number of reasons in the past or present.  To be honest, a lot of people would not like meeting others under the form of telepathy…but if they do not want to attract telepathy they do not like, they must let go inside and take a position of inner indifferent equilibrium, separating the positive and negative in each character.  If one ask people for the definition of love, one gets several answers, according to one’s experiences.












Energy of consiousness plays a telepatical game-poems-not easy a messenger






The energy of consciousness plays a telepatical game with our telepatical and other exchanges  In function of who we are and what we want and of who needs what in fact.  Those who know true events and words that their interpretation was wright, can have very good flash backs and discover connections between things and people better. Those who understand as well, or in lower degrees; but who realize that they were partly or entirely the cause of misdoings to others; can have good understanding of things as well, but in less agreeable dimensions. Do not blame them too much, they are seeking to escape from both sides of telepathy. Life puts people on our roads, sometimes we like them a lot till we find some angels who need the help of angels. In the process of helping them (and at the same time in a way, us, no matter the emotional road downwards they can provoke)…in that process they do not always like us for the effort…and by getting tired the stronger ones don’t always have the wright reaction…and the weaker ones can have very strong inputs as well. If there is something troubling you, have faith that it will resolve it’ self and trust the inner spiritual energy who is inside you or wants to be inside of you.




The heat is gone


The heat is gone.


Night has fallen.


Dark clouds refresh.


The light leaves the window.


Between white walls of a yard,


Bats dance the radar dance.


Soon as you think they’ re gone.


One comes back. Always the same maybe.


Picking the mosquito’s before my face.


No blood of yours for them.


In alliance I leave the light on.


Thinking while absorbing time and place.


The brain is a dark place…


But a lot of light is being transported.


There’s no such thing as a bat in your head…


A bat that picks away parasite thought.


You are your own bat inside.








New couple


New couple. Often it goes like this.


They find a lot in common.


A lot to blame their ex-es


They think their trust was misused.


Struggle with the lust for change inside.


Wondering whether to enjoy the lust of new lives.


Rediscovering to be glad.


They stop holding having something


Against the ones who cheated on them.


Experiencing the newly found joy THEY


Must have felt.


But the new love story often ends…


As the old one…


And insults and hurt replace tenderness again.




Left my wood one day


My wood where people looked for serenity.


Discovered a wood, hidden in a town.


Where ecologists do good things.


And I offered them my help.


Went in to town to tell the news.


But got a load of emotional stories about modern pain.


Could not take mine any more…


Lost my good temper…but it was in vain.


The message of my wood, not understood.


Forbidden to be too complicated, just talk along.


Frustration isn’t something for a public place.


It’s to be ventilated at home…


When tenderness has gone.






Back in my wood


nature, telematics, internet


the floating software of the one spirit


receiving trillons² of needs sending trillions³ of possibilities


with each time just one match for that period in time of being


telepathically connected drive of unfinished stories of past and present


wrote a poem about a bat to escape from battle


before it was on the net 3 book friends had used the word too


7 colors 7 sounds 7 continents 7chakra’s 7positive emotions 7negative emotions /7 senses/7 souls/7good intentions


Came near to things hellish and divine


Cracked both codes


Will keep a distance, thus no more someone’s or me to blame.


For the one percent of mistakes and wrong interpretation.


Being aware of once, one emo-link to many in nerve breaking conditions.


A lot of people preaching how to let go and be and live independent.


A lot of them live alone.


A lot of them get hurt.


And when they ‘ve learned from each other to abandon or let go.


They often forgot they were each other ‘s missing link.


How can one be afraid of a missing link ?



not easy to be a messenger

Like I said to my cat the other day : “It is difficult trying to be a messias these days.     If you only knew what is happening in the world or what has happened in my life, you would jump in to a tree and you wouldn’t come out”. Without followers one often talks to one’s dog or cat.  Nearly all possible things that can drive a man crazy, have happened to me or I have seen them happening and who know what is to come. Good, bad and terrible as well as heavenly. That is why I find myself in a good balance between experience and not having to go through some stages I already witnessed.      I drink my thee with honey, the water comes from a practically unknown well and I’ve decided to continue to be a messenger. One can be a messenger as well in daily life, in family and so on…but I long time ago was pushed to arrive at this moment in my life…translating this originally Dutch text for those I have not reached yet in that


language.  I already used a number of ways to try to express partly a social and partly a psychological and spiritual message. I try to think and talk and write about all possible issues in live, including philosophy, religion (faith) science and spiritual things like telepathy and the meaning of it all is to generate enthusiasm and participation to make this a better world with more people having more time to understand what they are doing here. In school I was critical, on my work I tried to do something about the social and political consciousness of my environment. On a familial level I gave every one, including myself in the end the freedom to do their own mistakes. On a political field I noticed that a number of parties were ego minded further on the right and on the other hand the center often swinging to the right and the left as well, with some inside opposition or a great division at the left side of the left.  I proposed to overcome it by adapting the old philosophical dogma’s of the left, making room for science to prove that eternal live indeed is possible. I invented a new political neutral system of worldwide telematics elections, based on an election to approve a worldwide social program without arms production and equal terms of production and the abolishment of speculation with money and raw materials...etc. I met a lot of people in different ways, all wanting the same while war after war and economical cries after crisis occurred.  Artists, politicians, social workers and each other profession, all on their own, like we often all on their own, occupied with their social and personal problems.  Those personal problems often prevented them from getting more and more conscious about the mystery of life and the ways it operates through us. We must unite more and more, we started off from one cell and we are spread genetically all around the world…interconnected more than the internet.


Innervoice-Light up our live-Some words to consider-In the begining





When everything you wanted to write aout life, has been written.


When everything you wanted to speak about, has been said.


When you've experienced all about love and hate.


When you've tried everything to influence the battle for power.




Then you realise you've only touched the mechanisms,


even dough you added a lot of undiscovered things.


Then you feel that even only in trying, you changed things,


while the negative tensions kept on giving life to the positive.


Then, when absolute calm is restored, you hear your inner voice again.


What was and is IT (she-he?) always talking about ?


Then you start wondering, why did it made you feel heavenly,


why did in some periods, it made you confuse ?




Could it be that matter and mechanisms are one thing


and the energy that makes that energy travel ...an other ?


Could it be that matter or mechanisms also can make sick


and do so because the original real strength must recover ?


Could it be that real strength is always beiing challenged


and must descend in to where the changement is due to come from ?




Oh purest voice of sensitivity


let your part of  wind blow, your part of matter glow,


your part of the water rise, your part of light inspire,


so I'll know what to write in a new way;


because the sky, aswell as other matter, is full of hidden energy


Oh dearest desteny, show me the narow pad


between rationality and the inner voices of intuition,


show me which seeds where to plant


so I and we can act more then as one


because thruth otherwise causes to much suffering.




While travelling on the narrow pad


the contact with the past and future voices of nature


came back again from beiing lost


in every period of your life , that you weren't an honnest  child any more.


When you aren't an honnest child any more, in fact you fall a sleep.


Falling asleep is not knowing where you really are.                                            


Sleeping also is necessary, but while you're awake,


try to have the wisdom of an honnest child.


Light on our life. Light up our life


There are many ways to understand why our life is our life.


Science can explain how life after the big-bang started from radiation tot atoms and cells and we. From a social point of view we can understand a lot about the relationship between history and economy.  Light on our life isn’t so hard to understand, changing things like poverty, war…is something else, because we are to busy working or understanding our relationships, to busy to light up our lives.


Some words to consider


He wanted everybody to be happy.  From early on as a kid ‘everybody’ meant the people in the village where he grew up, his parents and grandparents, animals and so on. It might be kind of funny for a guy of 55 to wake up with these thoughts which probably were elder then himself as he sometimes thinks on his moments of analyzing what life and his life is all about.  He wrote a lot about it in every possible style and about each domain in life, both in a scientific and literary way…until he reached the border where words have to give up and very special kinds of reasoning and feeling became difficult or impossible to describe.  What started off as an idyllic picture of the world gradually changed in a real understanding of what is going on in this world as a whole…not only in his personal life…in the broadest sense possible.  But let’s descend in too that ‘wanting everybody to be happy feeling’ was and became and is all about. One can wonder about it. Does everybody in fact wants to be happy ? Isn’t feeling unhappy a starting point to discover what’s wrong and isn’t being unhappy not both something that can lead to accepting reality and appreciating it ? 




Like in nature,  moments of aspiration and moments of expiring of situations go hand in hand. It is the longing for understanding and comprehension and the feeling of wanting to be loved and wanting to love that motivates us to exist. As far as sensitive people are concerned that is…despite the fact that almost everyone has certain degrees of sensitivity within themselves…and intelligence. One can be very intelligent and almost have no human feelings towards people surrounding oneself…in combination with brain damage due to genetic heritage or a fall for example or in combination with a mental disorder or a lack of love or misuse in one’s youth; this can even lead to psychopathic behavior. Sensitivity is what really makes us human in fact. Being sensitive seems to have always been under thread in history, but in combination with positive intelligence it made the world and a part of the individuals and the collectivity they belong to progress, amid a lot of bloodshed and misery.




So, where did his own journey began ? Which players would he encounter to understand the way life works ? Why and how had he evolved to wanting to write about life ? Why and how had he evolved from having compassion with unhappy people towards analyzing their lives in a critical but human and sensitive way ?    What had lead him to his main philosophical question : “is there an energy which did not have to go through the evolutionary road of radiation, atom, molecule, planet, cell…and us to reach our kind of consciousness “ ?      For others this meant there was a God or whatever name they gave it…for him it was more a feeling and a kind of energy…more a puzzle, both in a scientific and in a human sciences way…a story about making sense of nonsense.    And what is nonsense in an energetic way ? In physics, when something tries to take a volume that is less or equal to zero…the situation explodes in little or big bangs, probably ever repeating themselves.              So this means that, since everything is energy and energy is eternal , because it always evolves towards other forms of energy, life and we are eternal as well, taking under consideration that qualitative differences exist.     So what all those words mean, is that ghosts cannot exist, because everything and everyone has a volume…and that when something or situations or in the end, we ourselves approach the point of too much pressure upon us…things have to change in positive ways…and hopefully if one continues that line of thinking…in a positive way after our dead too. 








When one has known passion in one’s life and one hasn’t kissed someone in months, sometimes it can look like ages. Where is your angel then ?










In the beginning


Last week I went to an exhibition about the history of the universe and the necessity to save the planet. It’s a real wonder what came from the big bang, which symbolically means that something without a material form cannot exist, because something almost equal to zero tends to explode. The first moments after this event there only was radiation and then the first atom and so on until our consciousness.  The question whether there is an energy who did not need all that road towards our consciousness, I leave to teologists to dispute about, but there is more God to be found in science and especially in man and woman and their relationships and in people trying to help people in a social and individual way, then in sterile debate about texts who DO HAVE THEIR OWN VALUE to be interpreted in their own époque. All dough some texts show that they know a bit of special energies and this at an époque that science did not have the same knowledge as today; which proves that there is a relationship between the dead and the living, between ancestor telepathy and present telepathy…it are always the sums of both which determine what is going to happen, which words shall be spoken.


The final goal of economic, social and political history is that human kind should learn how to produce in an ecological responsible way and divide in a social way…in order to have more time to enjoy culture and to try to get the meaning of life by understanding who others and themselves really are. The spiritual world one cannot grasp by dogma’s alone. The spiritual world tries to combine the struggles between positive and negative emotions on a small and larger scale.  It is depending on the free will of people to act in a way that life becomes more and more  a conscious way of dealing with things.


A number of people have so much love in them and that love has often been so misused that they try so hard to prove to others where that love comes from in fact…from the spiritual world. They can feel what I missing in others and where it went wrong as well as the negative sides those others have to coop with. By doing so, if the ones with few negative emotions inside, become more and more enlightened about live. In fact that is why everyone is looking for tenderness in their lives.  Some have forgotten about this desire and replace it by all the practical things of life, who aren’t a ‘bad’ thing, but it has become their whole life practically. One often cannot blame those people by acting so because of the fact that unconsciously they know about their ‘pain points’ and it is too much of a burden to talk about them or chose other directions. They work and work in the material world, with no time for contemplation about life. They have relationships whereby they forget that in being truly together with someone who really is close to his soul and the spiritual world means being able to live with less food or less stress.  If someone lives together with people that don’t believe in the spiritual any more one of them or two of them lose the respect and the friendship and their love in the end. When one touches the real nerve of the personal condition of someone, one begins to defend some cultural or personal dogma’s. In dealing with practical people one can invent spontaneously some funny things to talk about, but it will not or no more o further, but in doing so you create  a little space in them. To reach people who still want to make an effort in touching deeper layers in each domain of life one can have a really deep conversation. But when one wants to remain on a spiritual level one has to remain with the positive and this isn’t an easy task considering the ancestral telepathy and the present one, continuously influenced by people with less consciousness about a lot. In relationships the degree of wanting to dominate others is an important factor which not only has negative consequences if someone needs a guiding hand still. 


There are so many interesting questions one can wonder about after reading “there was life after dead as well” ( link :   http://bloctaafblogartist.webs.com/      Does the negative heritage of someone keeps on living as well in the spiritual world, or is it an energy that only continues to have an influence in the existing bio world ? Both the strong and weak parts continue their story here, but spiritual energy hasn’t got negative parts, we only can create them, or are almost obliged to create them by the sums of as well ancestor telepathy as present telepathy. °°°°°°