innercommunication tools





43.innercommunication tools




the way our mind works in a spiritual way


Wish I could write this in every language and dialect ; each with it's own charm.  'Charm' is already French...we are one big family with the same roots.  One morning, a million years ago, 'African Lucy in the sky with diamonds', saw the sun rising in the east and went to Asia.Then people followed the sun towards the West, and discovered Europe and America




            Everything is always on it's way to expression.  Nature, since the very beginning worked endlessly on a system of reproduction and finer and finer communication...not only bussines-communication.  People learn to express who they are and what they have with each other.  In order to understand themselves they have to observe how their mind works.


The system even works without words and has many different forms of expression.  Everything is experience and expression.


The most difficult or complicated experiences will have to sink to the bodem of the river of life...in order to keep on feeling strong enough to continue ones road in life.  On such moments we can think positive again... on such moments we can write again for example.  The muse is then bigger then the a-muse.  One must always pick the best words to express something; when one writes a birth card to a new born one does not put on it : 'welcome to the world, come and collect your scars'.


If we really discover the beauty in ourselve, no one ever shall go and fight wars or nobody will get emotionally hurt.






getting closer to the mysteries of our mind…and getting enthousiastic about life again.




T O O L  S


ABT                Analysing back in time and forward


Exem.If one wants to know why we can take part in bourgeois political elections or not it’s necessay to not just study the history of our country but it’s necessary to dig for the roots of history, namely the economical develepmont that always determines the groups that are in power. ( See my homepage  users.skynet.be/octo unther 'history'.)


                        On the biological field it’s also a bit like imaging how cells evoluated to organisms and furhermore untill our intellect started evoluating…your trying to remember is like your cells, trying to remember their own past. ( See my homepage unther 'philosophy'.)


                        On the psychological field, all those things connected with our soul, can be retought of to…the more one gets experienced in life the more one can discover why your life was what it was.  By doing so you can reach the beginning of what is meant with those conditions who are a greater dimmension then everything concerning the ‘soul and all his positive and negative emotions’  The ‘elements of the soul’ are based on the elements of the body and his needs and senses.   Physics and Chemics were the bricks of Biology and Psychology…did they all together produce the spiritual world or were they beiing put together by a kind of main dimmension of that spiritual world ?


The answer to this question can be found in the question : ‘what is attraction’ ?


Attraction has driven atoms and moleculs and minerals aswell as the light and fluids to form life as we know it…and our developing consciousness has developed the way we live.  All this is one song.  (See my homepage unther 'poetry' and 'media')


                        THE FOLOWING  PHENOMENS ,like ABT ARE ALL TOOLS FOR


REACHING CONSCIOUSNESS ABOUT  THOSE INTERDISCIPLINAR KINDS OF CREATIVITY WHO MUST HELP US TO UNDERSTAND MORE ABOUT SPIRITUALITY.  Good Luck.  Maintaining the same level of consciousness shall prove to be not so easy, confronted with the practical challenges of every day life.


But it’s only in the interaction between theory and practice that our more then just ‘psychological ‘ voices can be understood.  On the top of  this kind of understanding one will understand how your environment will help you succeed in doiing what you were existentially ment for. (see tool ‘existential menu’ EXM’)






AFT                AFTERTHOUGHT


                        By this is meant all the psychological kinds of REASONING we can use to respond on practical things that happen to us or our relation with everybody and everything as were the practical things about this are concerned…to put it more easy :  All those things a computer can ‘reason’ about also.




                        If we manage to put of this ‘computerfunction’ in us, the higher dimmension in us starts ‘advicing’.  We can put this compterfunction of by reaching a certain degree of wisdom and calm in our life… or by living as spontanueously as certain children can…or by just  doiing the dishes, or doiing some kind of work you do almost automatically, or by beiing close to nature.     Exem. : when you get inspiration to write, but you can't get it on paper yet////or when you've had a 'fight in words' with someone and you want to take an emotional distance from him or her.


AX                   AXIOMA


            In order to understand some practical experiences and to discover the laws by which they occur or happen, we can put forward some suppositions and test them to keep on ameliorating our findings and axiomas so in the end we should be able to feel the laws by which life moves… .   By doiing so we come close to the spiritual matter…but we will never fully understand everything about it…maybe because we cannot support the degrees of truth about or own life and that of others….


Exemples for  axioma :  " Our ‘spirit’ is born when our soul stops existing" (when our emotional life here dies together with our body).  « There is a kind of conversation between living souls and spiritual powers » or « there is no inter soul-spiritual contact between spiritual powers, they continue their own development in another world ».


« Reincarnation is only a biological issue...we cannot return ». « Soul-matter is passed on by our genes, spiritual matter can not be passed  in this dimmension ».  « In order to give our spiritual development a bonus we must learn how to get a strong soul in this earthly dimmension ...this means getting independent of negative emotions».


 « Can we change our existential menu ? »  


BIT                  BACK IN TIME


Images and circumstances...of the past, still clear in ones head.  This is the proof that present and past are one...to prepare the inevitable future.   The only thing that does not exist (time) is the strongest one.




COINNUM           COINCIDENCE number     


COINTHA                      "            thaught


COINTIM                        "           time


COININT                       "             intuition


COINPLA                       "            place


COINBOO                   ¨    "          opening book on certain page with something relevant at the moment


COINCIR                          "          circumstances


To be solved  individually .All ‘coincidence cases’ : maybe it's just the INNER VOICE OR THOUGHT THAT’s getting confused : difficult to separate


CONF              CONFUSION


See former comment on COIN-cases, (also possible with other tools)




See  for exem. text ‘Wo we were’ unther philosophy


COMBT            COMBINING TEXT (thought, intuition...)


I do not know myself anymore what I meant with this.  Maybe it will come back to me in a strange way.  Oh yes, for exemple one reads a text in a book which refers to a problem




your facing and which you are writing also about...and an inner discussion begins (which looks a bit like the method of 'thesis, anti-theses, syntheses')




Is a kind of inner-voice like information, that like an inner-voice also can be literally or symbollically meant.  Sometimes what the image means can occure as a fact that explains something during the day but sometimes even a few days later or more… ?  (PS  I call it ‘dream’-image because even if one is awake you can have those ‘dream’-kind informations.  Sometimes even just talking to people you can have those dream-kind impressions…one forgets them easily and remembers them somethimes meeting those people or things again.  The real important ones you never forget.


DRQ                 DREAM ON QUESTION


When  you really want some info or some guiding concerning decisions you have to take…you can get valuable answers…on condition you are fysically and mentally not to weak at that moment…then you get rather confused answers.


DRE                    DREAM


Without the need to analyse, because you considered the dream as a kind of ‘after-meal’-effekt or a quick mix of the passed day...or based on fear or other negative emotions.  You forget those kinds of dreams easily and they not often come back in the day-time as images that come back again.




Very special energetic images that almost ‘touch’ ones deepest self.  Once you start doubting what they ‘mean’ and start giving a second or third…explanation they seem to lose their importance or value and it is more difficult trying to remember them for a long time.


DR+1+2           INTERCONN.dreams


Once I dreamt I was putting tons of fallen fruit on a truck that would drive the fruit to the siropfactory.  When I came back home they told me my oldest son had been working with my sister and her husband, he namely had been doiing the same work I dreamt of.  I did not know before and that kind of work is not often done on the fruitfarm where my son rarely works.


It was a surprise to me ,the more I was spending the night of my dream near the sea, a 150km away.  Interconnected. ?


DR+ -                 DREAMANALYSING


DR+ is when you have no problem analysing the dream.  DR- is when dreamanalysing can make you confused, you cannot enjoy dreamanalysing at that moment or in the period you are because of mainly fysical or (and) psychological reasons you are having in a period of your live


(can be a moment, minutes, hour,day, week, years…)where you can not reach your inner relationship very clearly.  It’s best to let pass those moments, hoping to be able to let go the ‘weight’ and negative energy in yourself by eating less or different, walking, laughing, enjoying what you do, slow down…only take decisions when you found the real you again.


DIA                   DIALOGUE


Some people have a very good vision-orientated memory.  Alike one can have a memory for dialogues .  To bad a lot of people remember the dialogues they should forget or the ones they misinterpretated.  This disturbs the understanding between people…but like in the world of physics with it’s + an - laws, dialogues have already brought a lot of people to a deeper understanding of themselves and their relations.  (communication.)


DIA+1+2                  "             more then two


The same as above ; but throwing one bal in the air and catching it, is not the same as playing with 2,3, 4… It’s a different dimmension of observing what happens.


Analysing what really happened happens almost always afterwards.




ED                     ENERGY DOWN


You know the feeling, you felt good and very quickly it seems something fysically is missing, something the soul or the embryo of the spiritual energy in yourself needed.


Somethimes this feeling dissapears by eating something with sucre(do not get adicted…), by drinking water…by goiing somewhere else in your usual places of environment where other confrontations await.  One can wonder in the last place which energy is using which energy to do or think or say what (only insiders will understand...people with temporally or constant law levels can 'eat' you)


EM+                  EMOTIONS   pos.


There is more water in our belly then in our lungs because emotions mainly come from the belly…when we’re little,we cry when we cannot get satisfaction in our needs :food, affection…some of us learn to be more content then others.


Turning the folowing negative emotions into positive ones is often a longlife task :


Fear into fearlesness, Jealousness into comprehension, Egoism into sharing, to Dominating lust into balancing the male and female energy in yourself, 


Fanity into Humbleness, Ignorance into Knowing, understanding…, Bach Flower Remedies have beautiful descripions about this…but like in positively thinking the remedy (or in case of the Bach Flowers the fluid) not only helps alone.  Positively thinking cannot do without conflicts as well as the homeopathic stuff cannot do without the action of the evoluating person.


Theory goes together with practice


EM-                             "             neg.


Getting stuck in them prevents you from evoluating.


EXM                  EXISTENTIAL MENU


If you are getting to much away of what you should be doiing with your life , then negative emotions and feelings aswell as positive ones...or things that happen can be used by life to correct you.


More about this very important energy later. Maybe my main exi.menu is about introducing a new kind of political system, but in order to be able to do so we’ll have to make people stronger in their pshygological, soul related life…therefore this study.


Or maybe my main exi.menu shall be explaing the difference between soul and spirit or the relation between them : must we get ‘stronger’ here in order to evoluate in another dimmension more favourably, or to be able to let those after us function better...during and after our own life ?


EUREKA -axioma.  Thesis : idealist axioma.  Antithesis : materialist axioma.  Synthesis : indifferent equilibre.         


The idealist axioma is based on the axioma that you keep on functioning OUTSIDE the body, related to the energy you left behind before you died.  Everyone evoluates in the direction of his dead, a moment when one becomes an unbodylike energy that will become part of the further evolution of the ones you leave behind...or evoluates more or less independently according to ones merits.  My materialist eureka is based on the fact that spiritual life can only exist within a biological ‘house’ and is genetically bound by means of family and further on….a statement that not necessarely means accepting the fact of interrelations between the material and spiritual world. Iisn't our earthly soul something in between the idealist and materialist vision , an embryo for the spiritual dimmension ?


That's why next  to the material and idealist axioma’s I also put forward the synthese : an axioma of


‘indifferent equlibre’ stating that once the biological life comes to an end we return to the consciousness of the elements that made us : minneral, water, air, light…hidden in the anti-matter of them…maybe enjoyable as well,but unconscient ?    So just by beeiing air and light an minnerals...they join the living in an indifferent way...feeding the living ones,




taking biologically part in their existence...and by their indifference, maybe have an influence after all. 


FACL                 FACT OF LOGIC


Rationality and his wife Logica is the most important tool in this material world.


FAO                   FUNCTIONING AS ONE - AS A WHOLE 


When you are in a period when you can really use the EXI..MENU tool, you will notice that everything you need is been given to you , in order to be able to do it…in the slightest detail you then can observe this in what’s happening.  After such a period (exemple writing, …)you do not stop evoluating and sometimes you will need new experiences- not necessarily on your main exi.menu.-experiences that will be more difficult to you, but with faith the exi.Menu -line and moments will come back again.  Using the word FAITH, I realise that I forgot another strong tool and energyform to put in this list.FAITH


FEE+                 FEELINGS  pos.


Are the result of the battle between + and - emotions : beiing happy, sympathic, glad, liking someone, loving someone (and all the opposite possibilities)


FEE-                             "          neg.




Sometimes mostly in the morning you get a picture (a kind of dream-image) that does not seem to relate with something or someone…but at the same time you know through your inner-voice(a kind of stronger dimmension than your intuitivity) that object or person will occur to you that day.  A very strong exemple you find page 93(the statue)


FFIM  have as a characteristic that they are related with following your roots, your EXI.MENU.  These kind of clear exemples not often show temselves. Trying to separate thought from innervoice in doiing this




One can put the folowing axioma hereby  « The fivpot is connected with the existential menu »also.  Ones first impression of someone is very important...a lot of things can happen in between and viewpoints can evoluate...but in the end you understand the role of someone in your life.  Sometimes you start doubting the meaning of your first impression.  If it's a negative impression  it maybe wasn't that persons own fault ? Some first impressions even are accompanied a picture with some symbolism which takes many years or a lifetime to understand.   If you become very good in this item, one day you can help judge others, once you become a spirit with a lot of earthly merits.


FOFE                 FORFEELING (kind of inner voice)


You know for sure something nice or not is gooing to happen…usally something that will make a big change in the lives of others and eventually or logically, your own life…


Or it can just be something funny that will happen.  That’s a good description, it’s like something funny just happened.


FOFEI                FORFEELING IMAGE(same as fofe, by means of image)




FTG                   FEELING TO GOOD (related with EXM) On such moments you are tempted to do some free-wil action to help someone... .  Afterwards it sometimes seemed not be be your own decision alone.


FORO                 FOLOWING OWN ROOTS(related EXM)


In times when rational decission making is needed. In moments when you make decission : if you not orientate on your own strength and if you are to compassionate with the ones who should rely on their own strength to be happy...you often take the wrong decisions.


FORG...              FORGOTTEN...Inner Voice, Image,                              Intuition, Thaught, Words, Instinkt,                                                                                        Happening,  Dream, Timing, Handwriting(change)what is needed comes back : (should be a very interesting axioma to examine in relation with spirit).




FWAH                  Free -will actions help


One cannot push others to do something if there is no inner change within them                  


HART : one cannot do something one dislikes when it comes from the hart(+ -) 


HUMOR  maybe the lightest material, the closest to the spiritual dimmension, maybe not                                                   


FORW                 FORWARDING(reason fantasises with situations, plans…)can the inner voice fantazise also with future ?


G                          GENETICAL HERITAGE


The practical automatisms that make biological life possible, biological material itself.


We not only suffer for reasons that we provoked ourselves, but also whe are have to deal with our genetical heritage.  Exem. you can get cancer because of what happened before you were born, because of malfunctionment, or by environmental reasons, or by weakening yourselfs in many ways maybe also.


GC                       GENETICAL CONSCIOUSNESS


The politics, the consciousness that makes the G move.  The spirit behind the G-matter.


GW                      GETTING W. (or WO)    insiders(relat.exm ?)


HA                        HAPPENING


Occuring facts ; often on the wright moment (or is every moment wright taking into account that everything and everyone finds itself on a certain point of his or hers or it’s evolution ?)




Often it seems that spiritual or pshygological(soul-related)  powers hide behind, or are the force behind what happens…as if they want to express something


HEA                      HEALTH


The relation between spirit and soul is often very efident, as far as viruses (or fractures…)are not concerned (not in all cases)




Is this the deserved communication from spiritual world ? If there is communication and there is, because everything is one world then maybe just asking strength generates the energy necessary for seeiing new possibilities to solve something… or just feel good.


HI                           HIDDEN INFO


The info you should be getting from the outside-world or the one you hide away from  in yourself


K                            KNOWLEDGE


Everything concerning physics, chemics, biology, pshygology,economics, politics, sociology, spirituality


KTO                             KLICKING TO OLD(descending evolutionary ladder)


when one should abandon old points of view, or transform them into new


LA                          LUNATIC AXIOMA's


LAT                         LIVING APART TOGETHER


LGW                       LETTING GO WEIGHT


By means of humor, funny observations, getting fysical (working in garden…)making love, swimming, showering, those good toilet-visits…


LIAP                        LETTING IT ALL PASS


Very special intuitiv way of analysing things, events, feelings, evolutions…best in nature, because nature pulls your energy up again…maybe this is the border with the spiritual world...to be compared with inner peace, but goes together with images, explanations...(related to ABT-analysing back in time, but this is much more with thought)


LT                            LIVING TOGETHER


LOMEM                  LOVEMAKING (emotional)


LOM FY                                 "            (mechanical)


LOM PRE                               "             (prescence)


LOMFA                                   "             (fantasy)




LOMINS                                  "              (instinktivly)


LOM-                                        "             (wasted)


See my many texts (essays and litterature on this tool, used for people to grow, but they not always realise it on their way of discovering the real meaning of earthly and heavenly love.  They often get stuck in combats.


LS                              LONETIC SYNDROME


Crash of almost every tool.  Patiently wait till it’s over.  Often best is doiing nothing to remain calm.  Wondering from where this LS comes will not help you.  Accept and let it pass, your faith will get you further through the mist.  Maybe thinking of snow on a high mountain or the air seen from a plane can help you.  Discover yourself.


LW                             LOVE WRITINGS


IHA                              interaction in what happens


For insiders, because danger of confusion and in worser case : lonetic syndrome


IT                               INTERTHOUGHT 


During a discussion some people thinking not by coincidence the same thing.


IM                              IMAGE


IMSY                         IMAGE SYMBOLISM


INT                             INTUITION(intuition is not inner voice,intuition is highest dimmension of soul near the spiritual border)when there is no negative emotion or feeling involved, intuition is not of a negative kind…only an opinion to guide you, or something to make you light, just like humor does




IP                              INTERPRETATION


somethimes at the same moment, somethimes few minutes, hours later or next morning, sometimes days, months years later  your views can change when you get new meanings about the symbolism of some events or persons.




IV+                              INNER VOICE,higher energy then intuition (from over the border of classical matter, anti-matter ?)


When there is no negative intuition involved, inner voices are never negative (+ an - is not used in a moral way in these explanations , but as energy-related conditions and force of circumstances.  The degrees of Innervoice follow the same scheme as I explained in EUREKA (the stronger, the more independent from classical matter)


IV-                                        "


IVeq                             inner voice : indifferent equalism


Is the main condition for beiing able to start having a spiritual vision       


N                                  observing nature


NES                              NEVER EXPRESSED SENTENCES


Arise mostly in interesting psychological conflikt-situations.  Learn to listen and put yourself above negative emotions.


NI                                  Novel Idea


P                                   PRACTICAL(exem.garage visit)


PIA                                Producing Intuitive Analyses(consi.it al.


See letting it all pass(liap) , but more spiritual analyses then intuitive ones…or are these kind of analyses only possible when you are completely a spirit ?


PH                                  PHOTOIMPRESSION


First impressions you get from seeiing a picture


PO                                  POLARITY


Like the weather moods change according to laws , events also can


PSOEC                          political, social, econo.facts


PR                                 special ways of 'p(r)aying




By using all tools correctly, spontaneously, when you feel good. It’s our task to feel good


QUO                              QUOTES (own)


QU                                         "         (from others)


QUE +                            questions asked at other beiings                        


QUE  -                            inner questions


QUE+-                            questions asked at higher level


R                                      relations


RCOP                              recognising possibilities               


SESY                               SENTENCE (symbolism)


SR                                     sense of reality


SFoA                               STARTING FROM o analysing


SI                                      SECRET INFO


What is to soon for somebody to know…because of unmaturity, or beiing able to bear


SJA                                   SJAMANISM


EBA                            EARTHLY BOUND ACTIVITY ( when to much use of  intelect...do something with your hands)


TRAMAT                transaction living matter


Insiders (see texts 'doodongewoon', 'bijzondere energiën,... colors, special energies of exclusive kind)


TSR                             Time and Space Relativity


Relativity, synchronism (exemple : computerschemes)                                                                                                                                  


TTEST                             TELEPATHY TEST(exem.being looked at)


Mainly fys., stronger between differ.+-


THEOR                                theory (confront cfr with word theus)


UT                                    USE OF TIME


WOEN                             WORDENERGY sounds also(exbyLM)


WOSY                             WORDSYMBOLISM


Collective consciousness


Individual Conciousness






Some English essays




39.how even you and a small community can save the world

            It was now almost then years ago since I wrote the following words :

"Peace will come in the hart of the ones with the honnest souls. Preserve the earth from destruction and lead the people towards better lives.  The world is one, never ever forget.  There is only one life and one world, take your responsibility and live as intense as possible. 

Be light to be a guide.  Go to the streets, speak of joys to be.  Your place is everywhere you will feel free.  Observe, restrain your forces.

Show them what the material world and the spiritual matter is all about.  The truth is very simple. It's hidden in the past, lives in the present and needs the future.  Why is there so little joy to be found amongst many ?  People do not wonder enough about who they really are and what the life they lead really means.  They should be more philosophers than materialists, they should ask themselves why they live in a society of wealth and poverty, peace and war, stress at work and unemployment. But there are other reasons for the lack of joy also...reasons one cannot write about yet...and reasons one cannot write about."

            Looking back at those words at the end of july 2006, I can indeed say that peace can only come in my heart the day people start thinking and acting to make this world a good place to live for everyone.  Why should we let the direction of this world in the hands of a tiny minority exploiting it for the sake of the same minority ?  Why should we be forced to sit down and watch this world go to pieces more and more, day by day ?  The ones we are used to see on our screens, shaking their 'important' hands, having a drink behind their long negociating tables, planning wars and presenting themselves as the saviours of the human race, in fact are the same ones that feed  barbarity.

They prevent people from having a meaningfull job and hold them into a kind a slavery.  They controle States and companies and therefore have a great power over our lives.  They in fact dictate what news is to be brought and they keep on writing their own bloodly version of history.

            And what about we ?  We accept the hundred ways in which they controle our lives.  When will it get through to a majority of us...the condition this world is in, is the result of our unconsciousness and our unwillingness to do something about it...we gave and give them a free hand.   Will we further allow them to lie to us about what real freedom and human values are all about ?  We won't...and 'we' begins with us.

            Which are the reasons why we often have a lack of joy and personal and social commitment ?  If we want to know where our negative emotions come from and who in fact we are...we should not primaraly go to our different kind of existing churches for an explanation.  If you like to go to churches and read some ancient texts, then do it in a way that you keep in mind that the people who wrote those texts were a product of their time as much as we are now.  Philosophical answers and faith can as well be found in the things that science reaches us then in several holy texts.  It is to be said that some of them have become



outdated, especially those who consider humour a dangerous thing and who teach that one kind of believers is 'better' then another one.  But let us consider ourselves as human beiings in stead of uncritical followers of some kind of believe.  By connecting philosophy with science I'll try to prove that believing in what science teaches us does not necessarily go against religious aspirations as eternal life. 





40.What we really are and where we came from. 

            In fact in our search for the meaning of life, we can start by realising that something can only exist if it has a meaning, a sense.

Why is that ?   Because something without a form cannot exist...every kind of matter that tends to take a space which tends to approach or equalise to 'zero' ...it explodes.  It's just like 'the' or one of the 'big-bangs' of the history of universe.  To much pressure on a certain point, makes everything explode, in both the micro and makro world...who in fact are one : stars, atoms, cels, ...even our relations...to much pressure makes new developments possible...if these are improving the position of the old situation...we call something 'meaningfull'.

            The laws of nature developed very ideal conditions for life as we know it to get started.  After the big-bang there wasn't really anything one could 'touch'.  Matter existed as different kind of radiation.  In Dutch the word for 'radiation' is 'straling'...when someone is happy we say he looks 'stralend'.  It were the laws and try-outs of radiation that produced the first atom and later on the planets and the climate conditions that created the first cell and so on.  It really is an amazing story which one can look up for oneself.  So next time you walk through a forest be also aware of the speed with which the earth unther your feet still travels in the direction it was pushed some 15 billion years ago.

            All that beautifull past, all the wisdom the first cells atained when they learned how to divide to stay alive...all of that stuff is still living the very moment you read these words.   When we die a part of us becomes minnerals and so on, but the radiation  leaves our bodies...the study of the way our mind observes and some personal experiences I prefer not calling 'mystical', as well of some scientifical studies lead me to strongly believe that our lives not only have a social meaning...but on a personal level we interact to create the conditions that bring us closer to our soul.  Our soul, not only the pieces of genetical heritage goiing back to the first cells...but the essence that is really ours...maybe it's our continiously enriched radiation from so long ago.

            In fact, isn't everything that exists not only one soul ?  We see 'God' as the ideal abstract person which controls everything, but in fact the purpose of our evolution is to make this world work so that we materially can live in peace to spend more and more time in comparing the ways in which we give meaning to our lives.  To someone who believes in reincarnation we would say that the same person can appear unther aproximatly the same conditions  after a billion big-bangs for exemple...or maybe we could answer that we were already there as a piece of all the ones we descended from.  We are a great mix, but the navigator inside us should always follow the line of his hart, not the line of how much money he can make or how he can take a revench on someone.  We should all try to overcome all our philosophical, religious and personal differences and negative emotions based on what ever happened in the past and forget our bloody history and start again by focussing on the present and wishing good things for the future to come.


            Matter and spirit have always been one.  Matter was energy and energy always means the possibility of creation and evolution.

Even if one tries to destroy energy you always get a change of form, no vanishing into nothing.  'The meaning of life' is something that has always been there.  The journey from nature to human culture was a very long one.    


Matter contains energy that has prepared the coming into beiing of spiritual energy...or maybe matter originally alwa was the total collected energy between two big bangs. 

The first meaning of life is therefore the coming into existence, the maintenance and growth of spiritual matter.  All chemical and fysical powers like temperatures, distances, speeds, pression, time as well;

all movements from atoms and cells ...everything serves the growth of spiritual energy.

            It has always been like this, because electrons cannot be destroyed.  Our mind is not only composed by the electrons of all our braincells, but of the atoms of all our other cells.  In fact we can say that all our cells have a specific  consciuousness.

            The question 'who are we', can best be answered by 'where do we come from'.  That question no longer is a monopoly of religion. 'Religion' comes from the French word 'relier', combining.  Combining science and philosophy and politics and psychology, helps us to understand the real meaning of our lives.  'Faith' can be based upon a beautiful smile or brilliantly used words or notes as well...the answer to the question 'the meaning of life', never only is intellectual. 

            In fact the ones who wonder to much about whether there is or isn't a God, are occupied with the following question : 'Is there an energy that has less or as much or more consciousness as we...and did that energy not have to travel all the way from radiation to atom to cell and human being to achieve this consciousness ' ?  What kind of energy is present in before a big-bang ?  The enriched energie of the previous cycle of big-bang and colapse in one point again ...or is it every time the same kind of energy starting all the way from the same energylevell ? 

So in fact what some call 'god' could be the expression of the longing for more energy, more enriched consciousness...in the present, future and past, the past, beiing the previous enrgylevellsituation.  In fact when when die we maybe still have our radiation as a form of beiing aware.

It thus seems that the creation of endless energy always restarts with not wanting to be nothing or nobody...both non existing things.   'Radiation' thus is the combination of all kinds of energy that existed in a cyclus between two big-bangs and which wants to start again and start something new.

Is it Einstein and others and their books and heritage or the radiation they are amongst us that makes me conclude all this after years ?  Who knows...because I somethimes don't I believe.

            Rather then beiing divided into traditional believers and their divisions on the one hand and those who believe in another way and it's divisions... aren't there enough other questions we should resolve ?

            Why isn't there a system for managing society that makes ignorance, war, poverty and famine impossible ?

            How come the relationship between 'lovers' or other relationships can be so complicated ?

            So, in one question :  'why does man have so much difficulties with those strange 'things' like god, dead, history, money or values like friendship, family, pleasure,lust, ...  ' ?

I think for one part it is because we haven't learned to observe objectively enough...aren't our observations continously beiing deformed by our own or the negative emotions of others ? 

On the other hand it seems like maybe even before the ejaculation and the landing of the egg, there's a game between coalitions of genes goiing on...like as if our past seeks to continue it's story in the future already...

not wanting to become 'meaningless' but learning the lessons the previous generations we ones were still had and have to learn.  So in fact life has always been and is an endless school, teaching in many ways.



41.We are also family, friends and lovers

            When you take a close look at  your own live and that of people you know, you surely often observe that it seems like personalities with opposite emotional characteristics have married or other, less official relationships.

It starts with attraction and falling in love and its degrees, that depend on how deep the relation, not only between the consciousness of the lovers is, but also how profound teir link with the collective consciousness is ( their degree of involvement in seeking where they position themself in their personal evolution and their degree of intrest in all kind of sciences; especially human sciences : psychology, history, literature,...).  The quality of such a relationship also is chalenged by the quality of the links with the different kinds of social or psychological relationships surrounding the couple. 

            In many cases a love, is simply sabotaged by the social living conditions ( as often ones cultural development is).  In all cases love is determined by the genetical heritage and the education of the persons who are attracted to one another, because they find something 'stronger' or 'sweeter' in one another.  People that have not learned to be emotionally independent will try to attract someone 'stronger' then them...the strong one will feel good, because, he or she is 'helping'...genetically spoken maybe this might be a contribution to an emotionally stronger child...but this is wanting to play some kind of Superbeing; life does not work in this way.

Because, if you look closely, the 'weak' one (and almost always each person has a stronger and weaker side) , the 'weak'-part 'gives' to the stronger one also, ...he or she teaches him or her to be more confident or look for somebody more emotionally equal. 

            Can somebody emotionally less unstable change her or his genetical code of behaviour and become stronger, and what is the relationship between beiing aware of all this and the subconscious and unconscious ?  A person can be aware of things, this means, he is conscious of things.  Depending on her or his educational, genetical and emotional background, one will start 'reasoning' about the elements in ones consciousness, with maybe to much the accent on money-linked problems or reasoning with an emotionally overreacting mind.  If one does not choose for the hart or for the intuitive richness a spiritual link can bring along it will take getting over a lot of confusion to find ones road on life again.

            Somebody who is open to his or her relation with 'nature' and feels a link with eternal things, can reach her or his 'inner' better.

People who have reached their 'soul' and are free from negative emotions , are not far away from an inner contact.

The really spiritual stuff, is the inner life you feel inside when you reach a non-emotional dialogue with yourself...and if you're lucky...with the person you love. 

Because if you meet somebody on the same 'frequence' , love can reach high mountains.  You can stay there more easily if you do not get into other relationships that reach a sexual level; because then you will again feel the power of what instincts can do in starting the process of emotional thinking again. (or maybe the 'new' person should be 'evoluated' or 'emotionally-strong' to ) I don't know yet, but this kind of situation would open the box of negative emotions as well I think.  The atoms and cells,  responsible for this behaviour can't act otherwise, because their original blueprint was one egg and one spermatozoid.  That is why everybody in fact longs for one steady lover.

            One lover. In the story of your own growingprocess towards your soul, this is a positif something, provided that you don't look for a partner because of material reasons, or reasons of emotional insecurity.  The relationship between two people can be so intens, that you can support that your partner still has somebody else...but in the end...all persons will bear the weight from the ones that suffer under the differences in communicating in all it's ways. (with words, body,prescence...).


When you have a good relationship with someone, or a good period in a relationship with someone, you can 'admit' you 'know' somebody else...otherwise there is something wrong...finding out where, is a mutual as well as an individual process; where the 'pain in the hart' or certain illusions force you to do some things or to speak some words that again, create new situations.

            I can imagine that married people, who married mainly out of emotional or 'resonable' reasons, are forced by their souls to look for someone else, and I can imagine that they stay together because of their young children for example.

I also can imagine that they even have no sexual relationship any more, but I cannot imagine one of the two staying single, then you stay a victime of the other, because your lack of beiing able to communicate to another man or woman in all it's different ways.

            Now the real problem in getting out of this kind of situation is , not beiing able to talk about it...because people are not taught to see the whole philosophical picture, they keep on using the old ways of thinking.  'Good', 'Bad' and 'Victim' in stead of looking to the specific genetical and emotional energy that is present in a relationship...only by doiing so, you reach your soul and from their onwards (and earlier) you get more open for an energy where no 'burning of negative emotions' is necessary any more...except if emotional love tricks you again.  In the end you'll know the difference between emotional love and intuitive love and their variations.

If you have a good love-life, your innercommunication functions better as well.

It's a pitty we use the word Love also in a sexual meaning; why not use the word Sex or Body-desire for the biological part of Love ?

            Maybe you are just honnestly and simply happy with somebody and you do not need other experiences because you know nobody is perfect. .I hope you do not start thinking that you are missing something, or that your life was incomplete because of one partner all your life...nobody is the same.   Maybe I don't have to teach you about love at all... how to interpretate the sounds, the words, the images, the events, the 'electricity', we can all learn to 'feel', instead  of just 'hearing' and 'seeiing'.  A lot of suffering, your own or that from others, will teach you when you cannot help or love any more. Have confiance, in the end it is a beautiful scenario, ones you've liberated yourself from to much suffering that makes you ill.  Your hidden forces want to express themselves through everything that lives and everything lives...exept people who don't want to become really themselves.



42.there was life after dead


introduction : my inspirationmap


Nothing is more 'real' then living life itself, how real art as well can be.

We all, we are characters in a real novel that has been going on since ages.

Persons create persons and then vanish again.

Since thousands of years we try to  put our experiences in to signs.

The more you understand about it, the harder sometimes to put it down in words.

The good man does, continues to live after him

The evil also.  Positive and negative interact in completion.

The sence of it all, in every way a powerfull, meaningfull something.

One can only observe and react, starting from an indifferent equilibrium

Science can give us a logical explanation about life.

A trained observer experiences more then the logic of things

Objectiv sciences mostly only have an eye for their field.

Phylosophy, Psychology and history must unifie the other logic.




Einstein put together the achieved and unveiled a new point of view.

Time, space and matter became more relativ then we tought.

Religion tried to make us believe in Gods and God.

Kowledge and truth still were far away from proving a new kind of unity.

Marxists tried to understand the laws of history.

Conservative establishment  was against the sence of life socialism discovered.

But nobody could controle the subjectiv factor.

Freud and others tried to show the role of the unconscious.

But they did not discover the deeper meaning of life.

We all, could be more people looking for the meaning of life.

A meaning that surpasses life and dead.

But we are trapt in a lot of kinds of habits and 'pain'.


Life itself is a source of inspiration for everything I wrote about in every literary form.

I can stop writing and let it go by me till I understand the meaning of it better within a few years...or I can try to make a rapport of it every day.  I taught about the structure of my day and had a look at my work and the things I studied, the documentaries I kept on video, some newspaper-articles which I kept because I thought they had a lasting value.  To make this understandable voor readers, I first had to bring them a number of philosofical life-attitudes.  How to start this ?  Those attitudes were partly the result of a critical study of the existing attitudes and partly the result of my own practical experiences midst all kinds of persons which are to be found in everyones life.

We've all got them : family, bedfriends, friends, social and political persons,... .


With all that 'brainstorming' goiing on in my head, I was afraid of 'boiling over' and remaining on my chair till inspiration came, looked like dangerousely reaching a unallowable border.  I went outside to sit on a chair and stumbled back inn.  Symbolically I closed the door.  Something cracked inside me.

I closed my eyes for the last time here on earth.  An unexpected goodbye, where I had philosephed a lot about.  A few things I had imagined, became true.  The experience itself was aldough quite different, something compareable whith what I had experienced during the cremation of an old colleague of mine.  There was this kind of magnetism that started in my feet and got upwards, like it seemed to be coming from the ground.  When it reached my hart, I taught 'oh', 'something is definitly wrong with me'.  But no, the magnetism accelerated it 's speed and once in my head, it became a kind of more-dimmensional triangle, pyramide kind of 'lightdimension' which, like a starship in scinece-fiction vanished into space.  This form of yellow kind of light, did it disapear into the spaces of mikrokosmos or the ones of macrokosmos ?  Or was there an indifferent equilibrium inbetween ?

Probably I was in tthe anti-matter that every matter has, in the mikrokosmical world ...but that world is eveywhere, even in the makro-world.  So I did solve a part of the mystery 'god'. 

In any case, there was life after dead.


During my life, I had three different options about dead.  We surely fell back into the elements from which we were composed; energies like minerals, water, air, light and waves with each their own kind of consciousness.  Since we were connected genetically with the rest of the biological world...we were not dead in that sense.  As a third option I already suspected that all ones usable experiences in life, which had started with the genetical three ...befor ones life; after dead could be used as an energy working in two directions.   That energy, like the electrons it was made of, is undestroyable; it can only


change in form...and that is what happens to us before and during and after our life.

I experienced my 'dead' as beiing reborn in an other dimmension, in the awareness that 'I' and 'we' had already lived for ever...far before the existing of the first atom and the first cell...as a kind of physcical energy with a 'soul'.  The feeling I had, was like watching the light that from the eveningcolors passes into the dark of the night and in a number of lightgradations is beiing born again in the morning. 

Just as like when you are living, when you do not know if there is life after dead, when you are dead , you do not know if you still have a body or not.  This is strange, very strange...from one 'mystery' you in fact dive into another. 


My individuality begon a long journey alongside our collective and individual past to the point of my dead, where individuality again seemed to vanish in collectivity and yet it had a separated existence at the same time.  It all happened rather fast, but on earth I would have needed many pages to discribe. The voyage I was on, went from atom to cell and the building up of our existing society, it was like checking an encyclopedy...but yet far more 'clever' than 'digital'.  The more clear the message and contents from the journey were, the more effort the voyager had spent in his life, to understand the meaning of life. 


The spiritual world was like a kind of internet-community, composed of the different kinds of tempers

of everyone who had existed sofar.  Every life was a kind of 'home-page' in fact...with branches to all the ones in the human story they had known.  'Had known' or 'knew'...it was not yet clear to me.

It seemed that the better it became to live on earth, the more beautifull the symbolism between the ones that already past away(the pastaway's) became.  Was this the moving-spring of the interaction between the two worlds ?


As soon as I reached a certain point NOW on my and our  earthly past, the new laws of my new form of existence, became clear to me.  They not only made my speechless, I also could not 'speek' any more, when I realised in which manner I could only express myself at the biologically lving persons.

There also was the awareness that they could use my energy and I theirs...but only in a symbolical, intuitiv manner through toughts and dreams and images and things that happened...a kind of 'inspiration' in fact.

I did not only have a 'voice' any more, I also did not 'see' any more...because I myself had become a part of light and air and all the other elements I was composed of...without knowing exactly what...like one can not see ones own intestinals and like one can only see onself in a mirror.   We only can feel the intensity of who we are.  Still I was able to think by means of images and taughts, like one can see images in his head in a biological body...aldough some scientists say that they aren't  there.

Another thing that became clear to me, was that I did not knew if I could still 'hear', because like something that was said...I could remember hearing voices and sometimes I wondered if a voice wasn't a taught.


With 'being dead' the 'emphasis' was beiing put more on 'feeling', even 'tought' was one.  Trying to feel with who in life you really were connected with.  Not literaly 'feeling', but 'touching each other in the spirit', not in the 'mind'(like in the soul) on earth...but it still seemed much like the positive feelings parents and friends can have unther each other.  It became clear to me that during ones life on earth all the consciousness and deeds one collects; all that positive and negative energy that interacts...at the same time on the 'other side' is beiing put together like a puzzle.  The final 'result' gives you the amount of


'selfknowledge' you have reached when you die.

Ones earthly 'soul', based on positive and negative emotions, who commands ones earthly life; sometimes let's go some pieces of 'spiritual information', we the 'pastaway's' , need...in order to be able to 'give'.  Ones final dead is the unified picture of your life, offered to you.  From the moment you understand this at the other side, you get a kind of spiritual orgasm that enables you to realise that you are not alone at the other side...and that one can communicate as well with other spirits over there. 

Just like on earth one needs other people to be oneself.   On earth  somethimes some people are  aware of these things, but those moments seem to disappear because the amount of events that come and go.  On the 'other side' there also are thimes when one can isolate oneself...that often are moments when one is the most in unity with everyone and everything.  Not always nevertheless.


Like on earth, life after dead is not always 'romantic'...because the proces of consciousness that started with the voyage from atom to cell, organism, animal, men and society...that proces continues after dead.  It depends on your merrits whether you are armed to be able to continue that awareness-project.  Your 'hierarchy' as well depends from your merrits...and this has not much to to with the diploms you got, neither with the kind of work you did?  You ,'biological living ones' should be amazed about some people you taught you knew and who they are over here.  But later more about that.   If I get permission to say something about it, I will, but I have a feeling I won't.

To be able to explain all this I have to get back to my puzzle of life

I did not only have a 'voice' any more, I also did not 'see' any more...because I myself had become a part of light and air and all the other elements I was composed of...without knowing exactly what...like one can not see ones own intestinals and like one can only see onself in a mirror.   We only can feel the intensity of who we are.  Still I was able to think by means of images and taughts, like one can see images in his head in a biological body...aldough some scientists say that they aren't  there.

Another thing that became clear to me, was that I did not knew if I could still 'hear', because like something that was said...I could remember hearing voices and sometimes I wondered if a voice wasn't a taught.


With 'being dead' the 'emphasis' was beiing put more on 'feeling', even 'tought' was one.  Trying to feel with who in life you really were connected with.  Not literaly 'feeling', but 'touching each other in the spirit', not in the 'mind'(like in the soul) on earth...but it still seemed much like the positive feelings parents and friends can have for each other.  It became clear to me that during ones life on earth all the consciousness and deeds one collects; all that positive and negative energy that interacts...at the same time on the 'other side' is beiing put together like a puzzle.  The final 'result' gives you the amount of 'selfknowledge' you have reached when you die.

Ones earthly 'soul', based on positive and negative emotions, who commands ones earthly life; sometimes let's go some pieces of 'spiritual information', we the 'pastaway's' , need...in order to be able to 'give'.  Ones final dead is the unified picture of your life, offered to you.  From the moment you understand this at the other side, you get a kind of spiritual orgasm that enables you to realise that you are not alone at the other side...and that one can communicate as well with other spirits over there. 

Just like on earth one needs other people to be oneself.   On earth  somethimes some people are  aware of these things, but those moments seem to disappear because the amount of events that come and go.  On the 'other side' there also are thimes when one can isolate oneself...that often are moments when one is the most in unity with everyone and everything.  Not always nevertheless.


Like on earth, life after dead is not always 'romantic'...because the proces of consciousness that started with the voyage from atom to cell, organism, animal, men and society...that proces continues after dead.  It depends on your merrits whether you are armed to be able to continue that awareness-project.  Your 'hierarchy' as well depends from your merrits...and this has not much to to with the diploms you got, neither with the kind of work you did?  You ,'biological living ones' should be amazed about some people you taught you knew and who they are over here.  But later more about that.   If I get permission to say something about it, I will, but I have a feeling I won't.

To be able to explain all this I have to get back to my puzzle of life


There was a reason why I had lived and why still live

            I 'watched' the places in the world that I had abondoned and 'saw' de growth of the harvests on the fields near the roades I had lived and traveled.  I saw the cars on the roads and the smoke coming from factories and some houses.  I saw the animals,but he people, I did not see.  Maybe I was in the people and that is why I could not see them any more. 

            Very strange in the begining.  My friends only lived in my memories...I only could see them in my memories, which was a way of better understanding how they felt...even on a present stage basis.

But how they felt did not preoccupy me at the moment, I needed my energy to concentrate on a text  of a novel or essay I wanted to complete.  I had called the introduction 'my inspiration maps'.

I saw the text lying on my desk, but how could I finish this book ?

Maybe there somewhere was a writer with still a biological life to lead, who read one of my former works and did not have any inspiration of from himself at the moment.  During my life I had called into existense enough energy to allow me at this moment to be 'connected' with a living soulmate. 

I would finish my book, through him.  Sometimes he would be aware of my special kind of presence without knowing.   Sometimes we were aware of each other, when he walked amongst the threes in the wood and taught about something he read about me.  I always wanted to plant a wood myself and there was this writer who lived in a wood near a pont and entered his chalet, took the newspaper and cut out my foto and an article on my life.  It gave me new energy to continue writing.  A lot of writers were still continuiing something amongst 'us' and 'them'.  Sometimes there seemed to be no difference amongst 'them' and 'we'.  Aldough we did not see 'them' busy with something...we felt what was going on in their world.  Like the living sommetimes were busy with the question what would happen after their dead, we, 'pastaways' were busy wondering what our next life in the 'afterafterworld' would be like.  Our form of energy in the afterworld wasn't eternal either and one day would change it's form as well.  Qualitivaly we had we had bettered ourselves because we mainly communicated with spirits from the afterworld that used to havethe same interests as we.  It was signitivaly how each of us tried to do this in his own way.

     Those who as farmers had been concerned about agriculture, received energy from those who liked doiing this on earth.  Communication between both sides worked as a system of connected fluids in different spaces.  The greadyness of a minority of farmers or landowners on earth often prevented the flowing of communication between farmers that were past away and those still active on earth.  Sometimes the representatives of the farmers in the afterworld came looking for advice with spirits that often had to deal with the same problems when they worked as farmers for exemple.

Then their was a communication amongst them and only the fact of this 'exchange' itself made it possible to generate some actions below that would improve something or that made farmers below aware.  But sometimes it looked like a neverending struggle. 



In the afterworld, the ones who caused those problems in the past suffered untill some improvement was made. 

         So my friend the medium-writer had to tell people below to watch out and think about the suffering of their relatives in an heaven, that wasn't always 'heaven' to them.  Their relatives or people responsible for some misery of others should  have to do something about it...befor they end in the same position.  If they act know, collaboraters of blockades between this world and the next shall free themselves. In the afterworld the painly part of the existence of ordinary working people is more quickly healed then of those who were responsible for big decissions.  People who had mainly good intentions adapt very easily in  what the afterworld has to offer.  People who produced many goog waves anddid many good things to help others ...still can feel how they are doiing...without suffering and without beiing able to help them, when they aren't conscious enough to ask it.

Those wise 'afterworld'-men only can give some inspiration and advice, but the 'antennes' of the biologically living people have to be functiong...and they don't when they are not in an emotional balance.  Someone with to much negative emotions is a real problem for both the one below who is partly responsible for those emotions as for the one on earth.  In many cases, help must come from other identities.

     The afterworld in which we function, only can make us philosophing about our 'afterafterworld' because from time to time some 'spirits' disappear here, like on earth, some 'souls' dissapear.

We use the term 'afterspiritss' here.  We are trying to find the way to get in contact with them.  Like on earth we still are in a kind of phase in between.  Such a phase, like on earth you can divide in a number of stages of progressing or backsliding consciousness.  Once more, what was already clear to me on earth became more clear to me in the afterworld.  Everything is one and connected, but there are a numbe of phases.  Like from silence seven sounds are born, with whom one can compose music, like from white all other colors are born.  Like tought, feelling and inspiration can produce at least seven expressions of literature...from shouting to poetry.....Like one can touch someones skin in several ways as well.  It was rather strange that some of us missed those last feelings and others didn't.  Wy ?  Again a question for us to solve.  Did 'time' only continued to exist for those not feeling well because of existing ? 

   Looking out for a new stage of existing in our development was a new kind of enigma, riddle to us.

I , unlike others, did not believe that we were going to reincarnate in an other earhly body after disapearing out of the afterlife.  I believed more in spiritual growth and trying to show the ones on earth, our genetical three, we partly left behind; that they had to help themselves to be get conscious  happy and make a better world...in order to have a better life as well in the afterworld and help us at the same time by doing so.  Our mutual development was interdependend.

   I wasn' t much 'home-sick', I did not want to go back to the physical soullife, that was the embryo of our spirit and I did not think it was possible to return.  Maybe I never know if some of my friends in the afterworld would have indeed reincarnated...or if they would have been 'promoted' to the afterafterworld.  They'd better leave those reincarnation-ideas to the policy of the 'wisdom of the genetics' of the earth.  I , for the moment was already satisfied enough sharing the positive events on earth and seeing there really was a lot of hope for the world.   

   We spirits, in fact lived partly in the same world as the earth-people.  Because we were pure air and light and waves...again, we were part of their chain of nutrition...and we had an influence on their daily lives.  Some of my friends in spirit even went so far to think they could partly return by beiing present in genetical material.  "No wonder an ejaculation is


such a crowdy buzzy rush-thing", I joked.        There had to be a number of connections between the three different kind of worlds, just like the past and the present and the future are in fact one...maybe the earthly-life, the afterworld and  the afterafterworld were one as well,all together interacting in a dialectical way.

   In the afterworld it was as well 2003 as below, and I was there since 1979 already.  We used the same time and in fact there only was one...others said that according to Einstein everything was possible, even returning to the middle ages as a baby...but I answered that they should not use Einsteins inventions to but him those words in his mouth. By the way, did anybody see Albert here ?

Nobody answered, so probably he already was in the future.


   I 'listened' to stories of the lives of my friends in spirit, and I answered just by beiing 'present', that's the way we talk over here.  My conclusions were sent to the interfering frequencies of the medium-writer on earth I was in contact with...not like 'dictating', but just 'waving' some inspiration together, like one picks flowers and afterwards gives them as a present.  My memories and his experiences produced the rest of the spiritual food.  It depended of what kind of literature the medium-writer wanted to write in, in which neighbourhood in the spiritual world I was to be found.

He is a good writer, because I often am to be found on high frequencies. 

I decided to review some of the things I wrote in my time.  In my earthly days I always had to look and look again to find my text...here they came faster then an internetconnection to me, without having to type something on a search-machine.  The fact that I was buzzy doing that was enough for the writer to have courage to continue with his work on special energies after his morningwalk.  Maybe some day, he would discover us ?     My wish to write again, became his wish to write again and otherwise.  

   Where to write about ?  About the ones who comit suicide  on earth ?  Some of them exausted themselves on earth because they had to many good intentions towards to much people...they recovered more quickly the the ones who spent a life complaining about their lives.  Sometimes they didn't cure at all.  A lot of people who had died and who were no suiciders, in fact were suiciders on a long time basis.  They could cure spiritually as well because it wasn't always there fault that they didn't discoverd the role of structures and people and emotions in their lives.

   Sometimes we in the afterworld supose that the afterafterworld can guide some energy from the ones with less energy to the ones with not enough energy.  I think I'm not ready for that job jet.

I had to many experiences giving my energy away for free in my lifetime...maybe it never was my decision...and maybe the decision was taken above my head. 

   To change energy seemed to be to me a far healtier proces then only profiting from someones stock. It means learning to express yourself and act in the commun interest I think.  I means recognising ones limits and possibilities in the total picture of connections.  In the afterworld those who can give advice, do not have to suffer any more by taking over the sorrow of others.

   I discovered that the more people were victims of fear and not-knowing, the more they were influenced  by negative ideas.  The negative influence of pastaways who did much damage below, lived after them, but could not come back.  Only the positive could come back.  It really was encouraging.  The meaning of life, in fact was that everyone should learn how to get really 'strong' and 'good' in order to learn how to be able to be a good advicer in the 'hereafter'.

If you didn't discover the truth about your own life, you would return to the pure elements of nature, without being aware of who you in fact were.  The meaning of life was, is and shall thus be of preparing yourself for afterlife, each in ones own way...whether that is


cultivating tomatoes or writing, it can have the same result.  Life is not only transmitted through genes, but also by means of air and light and waves and the rest of nature's transport.

Life can be passed on, not only genetecally, but also by the elements in nature unther the form of energy...if it had gained the power to do so.  Important to know was that one always could be present in the dimmension you left...not only genetically...but also in the elements you fell apart in.

Even past, present and future were one and for some in a large extent for-feelable.

            From my new kind of feeling I could pas this to the writer that I cared for almost half of a century (even when I was alife).  He had read a few of my novelles.  I could help him finish his search...and I proved  him that only 'the good' , the source of everything could return.  Because I knew he still needed prove...so I helped him.  He knew that 'nothing' could not existed...because everything always tends to explode when it is equal or near ZERO...something without contence cannot exists, meaninglesnes cannot exist. The smalle something gets the more pressure is exposed on it.  This is the same for stars as for human relations.

He knew that the electrons were the undestroyable brics of everything.  He knew a lot about the elements  eand the game of electrons with their proton and neutron charged atomnucleons and their condition of indifferent equilibrism.  Whenever he was studying I helped him reach the symbolism behind al those laws.  He was enormously interested in the things of science.  He realisied he always met the right persons and read the right books to help him answering the links between life and dead.

He found out that with every end of something fysical, chemical,...)the consciousness of those elements  moved to the not yet vanished elements...because the wisdom of the original composition did not have to disapear.  Thus physics and chemics became biology, because the main law of life is that everything is an evolution to more and more consciousness.  The first cells die without beiing able to multiply themselves. 

The consciousness of those cells came as a kind of energy 'visiting' the folowing cells  that still had a classical living string with nature ...in those days when there were not yet organisms thar could move independendly.  The consciousness of the 'dead' but not 'dead' material (who was transformed in another kind of matter) came visiting  the new still living cells giving them 'advice'.  Those visits let to cells beiing able to DIVIDE themselves...which let to biological reproduction , the first independent organisms and a consciousness that became more the just the sum of the elements and combinations it was build of.  Nature was trying to teach us, that in order to survive you had to learn how to divide.  Then came the step from animal to men...from looking to things to thinking about things.  Men build relationships in their tribe, later their village, their town and so on.  On a graveyard in a village you can see the amount of combination life used to use to guide the game of attraction and repulsion, of equality...to always filter passed and present.

Poverty, wars and natural disasters have intervened in this 'wanting to be of beiing'...they must be prevented because they disrup things on a certain level.  We have to get aware of this.         

the way life operates/special observations





37.the way life operates


            In each epoch of civilisation people wrote. In the beginning they didn't write about how after the big-bang, the invisible forms of matter we call 'radiation' created the first atoms, how later on planets were formed and how the first cells came into existence. 


In fact 'coming into existence' is not the right word to express something concerning evolution...everything that exists existed already for eternity.


The main reason why life exists anyhow is because something without a form, something meaningless, cannot exists...a form of matter that tends to become equal or smaller then zero, explodes.  This was the reason for the bigbang.  To much pressure on anything and


anywho and new situations and creations and development will follow.  One can say that we are who we were ment to be because in fact we were there already in the form of radiation earlier then the first atom that was created...which also isn't a correct way of putting it because the first atom already was a piece of the first radiation and so on.


We came a long long way and in fact we're much older then the latest bigbang some 15 billion years ago.


            If some day maybe the last human beiing on earth or in space will die, a part of him will become once again a form of radiation...in fact for a part we are radiation...but we cannot touch it...or can you 'touch' your conversation when you are phoning without wire ?  When you study science, you will find a lot of metaphors that will try to show you how life operates.  'Life'...not only our life, but the total beiing of it. 


To become a more conscious person, this 'feeling one with life' is the first step we should learn to take. Just like nature can miror itself in each drop of dawn in the morning, we, if we allow some light in our consciousness, we can feel the unity of the universe inside ourselves.  Whenever we feel 'divided' we should try to imagine the basic principles mentioned above.  Feeling one with nature isn't so hard to do when you take a walk in a quiet place...and even those who live on ther country somethimes forget about their links with the univers.  Always remember, even in a flat on the fourth floor it's possible to feel good.The trouble is that we mostly feel  seperated from our origins because of the fact that we must eat and have shelter every day, we are social beiings...our worries about things like money and other material needs are a  risk to  feel divided with who in fact we are.


            An even greater risk that threatens our feeling well and undivided, are our negative emotions.  Even if we do not have financial problems, even if we like our job...negative




emotions can make us completely nuts.  As long as we can feel some positive emotions there still is hope for each of us.  At the same time, while following the line of positivity and while trying to understand negative emotions...we should be severe to them...they only come our way in order to teach us who we really are and why everybody must take responsability for his own life, not trying to seek a revench for the pain one suffered or started.  How can we use those positive emotions to create a better relationship with ourselve, with the ones we meet every day and with the rest of the world ? 


Why we allow so many people of using emotions  or money wrongly to spoil a part of our lives with their lies ...aren't we around to teach them a lesson from time to time ?  


Good and evil do exists, but the devil is our own creation.  We musn't allow anyone or ourself to divide us in any way.  


            'God' is our own invention too and this idea or this feeling indeed can help a lot of us...but it can also, once again, 'divide' ourselves in groups of different believers.


Why should someone who plays rugby look down on someone who plays football...they are both sports aren't they ?  Why should protestants want to fight catholics in Northern Ireland or why should sijiets murder sunnis or vice versa ?  Division always looks around the corner...if you are a happy couple ...why invite trouble ?  Sometimes life uses differences and trouble to obtain some purification, the less conscious we are about this way of progressing, the later we realise what is happening to us in the meanwhile. 


            In Europe we do not go to war any more against each other.  How was it possible that war broke out then before ?   Wasn't war always the last phase of economical competition between tribes or countries ?  Always some leading economical groups in society make war with the help of their political friends...they cannot do so if the ones who chose them, take an undivided decided action against them.


No country can afford to go to war when small businessmen, farmers and workers go on strike against it.  Sometimes life succeeds in creating the conditions to make such positive things possible...aldough a lot more coordination between different worldevents stays needed.  In other cases things go from bad to worse with seemingly no end to it. 


Just like in our own little lifes with their ups and downs and downfalls.





38.special kinds of observations


            *Yesterday I saw two chairs standing near the water.  All the year they had waited for me till I would find the right time to sit on one of them.  Seasons past by.  It was now summer.  A hot day in the afternoon.


            I sat myself down and after a while I noticed the shadow of the hughest tree of the parc in the water.  The slightest movement of the smalest fish can make the water move all the end through the other side of the pond.  The air was filled with a little wind, enough to make the tree dance in the rimpels of the water. 


The branches of the three grew bigger and then again smaller, like if some kind of fluid was passing through them.  The branches seemed to become a gigantic pump through wich it's blood was pumped.


            I imagined this was like when someone gets a hartattac or something...a vain breaking while to much pressure made it explode.  The dancing leaves in the water seemed to be like the smallest bio in our longs, very meryly operating in their territory.   I sat so silent and forgot about the parc, concentrating on this essence of life, that once my concentration was broken I saw the shy wild parccat with a whole bunch of her young traversing the parc, tails in the air...so that was why I turned back a few hours earlier when I wanted to get me a cat with someone I know...lifes work in often predicting, unexplainable ways.  When I wanted to get some food for the cats the whole lot of them flew in all directions...one little cat forgot on her trip in the outside that their is water where






land ends...and fell in the water...swimming onto a nest surrounded by water.  When I took the boot to catch the wild cat, a stupid idea, I discoverd that a pair of waterbirds indeed had made a nest on top of a whole lot of lost wood I had put in the water.


            *If you pay attention to what is beeing said between two people or more, it is the result of what goes on in their separated minds...but in an aditional form.  Even the place were one is, is the result of what went on in one or more minds.  Both statements are the logic result of a number of things happening every day...slept upon through the night and getting more ready for execution the following day.   


            *I drew a picture while I was phoning with someone...first some geometrical blocs one after another, then I added a head that smiled and a tail...while the conversation continued I put eyes in the blocs and added some blocs unther the blocs and made trousers out of them...in the end it looked like an Asian dragon who was dancing. 


The dragon was composed of some people, cheerfull.  The thing I didn't told in the conversation was that the day before I was in the company of Asian people and their European friends, all very satisfied.   I had completely no intention of drawing the dragon, I only saw in the end what I had drawn.  Even more special was how I found the pub where those people were.  I saw a falcon sitting on a wire when I drove to my chalet.  Later on I went to find a pub were I could drink something and I saw a name of some pub called 'Falcongarden'.  I entered and much to my suprise I ended up amongst the friends I mentioned above.  The day befor after watching a documentary on the stupid war of imperialism in Vietnam and a conversation with the Vietnamese wife who has a take away in the village I knew after the firework I watched with her husband and children that some Asian encounter was again to take place...but on the moment of seeiing the falcon, I even had forgot about it.


After that events in the evening I put on the television and on that very moment a Falcon was catching one of my favorite birds who comes to eat here often...that day I had seen a remarkely big one for his size (not a falcon).  Those special birds,... when I saw one one day a man came to visit me a few hours later and later on he build many nests for birds in the parc where I live.  Birds, they live on the branches, those vains from the earth.


More then a month after writing this I haven't had time any more to visit my Asian friends...because other events who made me put more attention to my work, crossed my way.


            *I called my philosophical project in the parc 'food for the mind'...isn't everything food for the mind, even the real earthly food itself ? 


            *Images of people, dead or alife can somethimes be more 'present' then real presence...it's just presence in another way I think.  Light is knowledge.




social ethics


            *A woman who contributed her life to the working class died in april I read.  Someone wrote an article to remember the story of her life.  I enjoyed it very much.


            *The leaders of Israel and Palestine  keep on wasting their future away...while Irak is staying hell on earth.  When people desire a more just share of the wealth, they are crushed in history. Socialist orientated small groups do seem to recognise more and more the valuable points in each others explanation, but they do not admit it as such.


emotional weight


            *Some people will always tend to hurt others just because they themselves war hurt before.  Whether they were themselves to blame or not.  Their beiing clever to achieve the revenche, goes beyond a lot of imagination.  A lot of the tricks are so transparent that you provoke yet more of their anger if you find a subtile way of letting them know you read their mind.  Be aware of those how tell you that they had a very bad relationship and still suffer from it...listen to people who are gratefull about their experiences and to people who have




forgiven.  What I endured in life is not understandable for the majority of people I know.  


            *Sometimes I ask myself whether children with parents that were not so close together as they taught have less opportunity to lead a stable life...but I do feel that every person who was born couldn't have done otherwise...this has nothing to do with reiincarnation in the hindoe-way, but because of the forces of circumstances that are pushing people to make people because of the genes that have to be spread and the lessons about oneself and others that have to be understood.   One can only understand this thoroughly if you imagine all personages connected in the same story, seen from different angles.